Is Your Phone Hurting Your Confidence??

 

Recently I had the unthinkable happen: the screen on my phone stopped working rendering it useless. After trying to fix it through numerous means, I had to accept the fact that it was broken. At first it felt pretty weird not having it, but I soon noticed something very interesting.

I was actually happier not having it in my pocket. I started to get more pep in my step, and I noticed a lot more of what was around me. This got me thinking: do phones have an impact on our moods including confidence level?

Phones are undoubtably an important asset these days, and could easily be called an accoutrement to our modern-day style. 

However, despite offering myriads of tools and having numerous applications, phones can have a negative impact on you depending on your relationship with them. 

While some people are able to limit their phone usage, other people simply cannot. In a 2021 survey, 75.4% of participants said that they were addicted to their phone and 83% said that they feel uneasy leaving their home without their phone. For many, phone usage is taking away from social experiences like dates, and even becoming dangerous with 40% of people admitting they look at they phone while driving (but that's a topic for another time and probably for another blog).

This got me thinking about how cellphone usage might be negatively effecting our levels of confidence. Is there a correlation between how much you use your phone and how much confidence you have? 

The answer, I believe, is yes.

Think for a moment about how a confident person generally appears:

The posture is cool and relaxed. The facial expression is calm and assured. The style is usually impeccable. You almost feel drawn to confident people because their energy is so high. We want to be around others who exude a high level of confidence.

You can tell this guy has a ton of confidence just by looking at him [Photo Credit: ThisKingdom]

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Now think, if you will, how someone constantly using their phone looks.

The posture tends to be slouched and passive. The facial expression is usually blank or seems like it's responding to the phone. The style doesn't have the same impact it does on the confident person even if they are dressed-up. When we see someone preoccupied in their phone it's usually a signal to steer clear because we assume they don't want to be bothered. 

Despite the style, the message this guy conveys isn't quite the same [Photo Credit: Masterfile]

It seems to me like there's a definite correlation between how confident we seem to others and how often we use our phones. But can using a phone too much make you feel less confident?

Again, the answer is yes. According to this short article, because using a phone too much will negatively alter our body posture, over time:

"[excessively using a phone] might play a role in diminishing your feelings of power and strength (both mental and physical)"

And since how we perceive ourselves is a huge part of how much confidence we have or don't have, the logical conclusion is that using your phone too much can, greatly diminish, even ruin, your confidence.

In addition to how we see ourselves and how others may see us, phone usage may also lead to feelings of isolation, which in turn can greatly impact our confidence [See attached video for further explanation].

The bottom line is this: phones can and probably are doing more damage than good. With more and more people using their phone as a crutch to avoid social contact, they are taking away from our experiences and in turn hurting how we see ourselves.

The good news is that you have the power to not let them happen. The solution is theoretically simple, but much more difficult in practice especially for those who are addicted to their phones.

But the solution is to simply resist the call of your phone (no pun intended, if you're getting a call you probably should pick it up). Understand that you don't actually need the phone to distract you. The phone is meant to be a tool, and a great one it is. But it's not meant to help you get out of social experiences. Resist the urge to do use it to that end and slowly over time you will likely notice an elevation in how you feel.

-Ryan

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How To Impress Literally Anyone

 

We've all been in moments in which we felt it imperative to impress someone-- perhaps it was a first date or maybe a job interview. And in those moments you may have realized that sometimes it can be challenging to impress the other person. 

There are a plethora of different reasons why that might be. Maybe the person just doesn't vibe well with you. Maybe they think you're too straightforward. Maybe they can't get over how much fragrance you're wearing.

The worst part of all this is that if you do not impress the person fairly early-on in the conversation, you're probably not going to change their mind about you later on.

But what would you say if I told you that there was something you could do in virtually any situation to score points with the other person?

Fortunately, there is!

And it's something so subtle, so seemingly obvious, that you could start using it in your very next conversation.

But before I tell you the sure-fire way you can impress literally anyone, let me ask you this:

How do you feel when you're the center of attention? How do you feel when you're able to talk about your ideas with someone? How do you feel when all eyes are on you?

Unless you're someone who suffers from anxiety, it probably feels pretty damn good, right?

You feel bold and important and may even think more highly about the person or people listening to you, that is, you might be impressed that they're giving you the lime light.

In a mostly self-centered world where everyone wants to be seen and heard, it is immensely flattering when someone acknowledges your insights and perhaps even praises you for them.

Ergo, how you can impress literally anyone you converse with is by allowing them to talk more about themselves and seeming responsive to what they're saying

As a rule of thumb: talk less, listen more, and ask genuine questions about what the person's saying.

Often these days, people are only partially listening to others in conversation. They're most likely listening for something they can respond to, and then formulating a response while tuning out the rest of what the other person is saying.

This doesn't make for good conversation though. Neither is it enjoyable nor is is beneficial. You might even reflect back on the conversation and wonder what you were even talking about (it happened to me several times while in graduate school).

When you stop feeling the need to insert your two-cents into the conversation and instead actually listen to the other person, you'll notice two things:

1. You'll enjoy the conversation more and perhaps learn from it

2. You'll notice the other person feel more comfortable and by the end of the conversation appear more friendly.

Because people tend to be self-centered and love talking about themselves, when you allow them to do just that, they're going to respect you more for it and may even think more positively of you.

[See the attached video for a personal example of this]

Now, you're not always going to find everyone super interesting, and that's why I said seem responsive to what they're saying. 

It's an even worse feeling to be given center stage and noticing that your audience is falling asleep due to boredom. 

That's why you should always intently listen and seem engaged in what they're saying even if it's a boring topic. You're looking to impress the other person, not hurt their feelings!

So next time you're in a situation where you want to impress the other person or just seem like a stand-up person, ease-up on talking about yourself and instead put the majority of your focus onto the other person.

-Ryan

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In Defense of Earth Tones

I've always had an affinity towards wearing earth tones. I think maybe because my birthday falls on the fall equinox (no pun intended...actually, it was kind of intended).

Even though they have never been my go-to colors, they have always had a special place in my wardrobe.

The thing about earth tones-- which consist of browns, greens, reds, and yellows-- is that they aren't the easiest colors to wear. I find that most of the time when I do wear them, I wear them all together. 

So for example, nine times out of ten when I wear my favorite brown sports coat, I pair it with my dark brown or swamp green chinos and either a white or yellow shirt.

Note: While I am talking about earth tones in the post, I commonly use brown as a reference point. That is because brown in the most common and easiest to wear earth tone.

But without further delay, here are 5 reasons I think you should consider wearing more earth tones:

I. Earth tones are a bold choice that will set you apart from others. It is true that there are other colors like pink that will set you apart, but when you wear an earth tone, you're going to have a much more powerful presence than if wearing a color like pink. That's because earth tones like brown are often associated with power, strength, and success. People are going to be drawn towards you because of your bold presence.

II. Earth tones are the perfect colors to wear in the autumn because they blend in. This one makes a lot of sense and probably needs very little explanation. In the autumn, wearing colors like brown, green, or yellow, will be accentueated by the changing leaf colors (assuming you live in such an area where that happens) and orange is a perfect choice for October because of pumpkin harvesting. Earth tones are just an ideal choice to wear during autumn.

III. Earth tones can be incredibly masculine. Perhaps it's because the aforementioned traits of power, strength, and success, but for whatever reason earth tones are an incredibly masculine and sexy color to wear. Earth tones like brown also give-off a sense of ruggedness and that you're hard-working; both of which can also be seen as desirable traits. I think, in a sense, brown conveys a very similar message to the one conveyed by black, but it tends to be a bit more powerful and bold when worn by a man, whereas black is going to look super sexy on both men and women.

IV. According to customhomegroup.com, earth tones are typically considered "friendly, contemporary, and inviting". The same goes for when you wear earth tones. I think in a way this makes brown a better choice over black. While black is going to make you appear somewhat aggressive, earth tones such as brown are going to make you appear more approachable and trustworthy while still retaining a lot of what black conveys. Think of wearing an earth tone like the perfect balance of wearing black and wearing blue. When I envision someone wearing an earth tone-- like a professor- I picture someone who can go from being super serious and focused to extremely friendly and welcoming. 

V. Earth tones can make you seem intelligent. Brown and other such colors are one of the few colors that convey a message of intelligence. With most other colors we get a sense of the person's personality, but with earth tones, you get insight into their mind. According to bright side.me :[a]...man in a brown jacket give[s] the impression of a reliable, intelligent, and rational person". And it makes sense: think back to when you were in school or even just depictions you've seen of academic life. Professors were always apt to wear brown. Usually a brown sports jacket, but also brown suits, brown waistcoats, and brown jackets. That's because brown is just a smart color.

With Autumn right around the corner, I think now is the perfect time to start implementing earth tones into your wardrobe. Of course, like me, you most likely won't wear them all the time, but wearing a hearty brown or burnt orange can be a great choice; one that will make you stand-out, look really good, and make you appear more intelligent. 

Earth tones are truly a set of sophisticated colors, and I think we could all use to wear them a bit more often!

-Ryan S.

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Let's Talk About: Dior Homme Sport

 

Dior Homme Sport, which was originally released in 2008 and has since been reformulated a few times, is a fresh, invigorating, citrus-heavy fragrance. Personally, I've never been a huge fan of citrus-based fragrances primarily because they don't tend to work well on me. 

However, DH Sport is an exception. Not only does it work well on me, but the composition is perhaps the best citrus-based formula that I have ever experienced. It definitely has a very clean, shower gel-like vibe to it that I immensely enjoy. 

The Dior Homme line has been one of my favorites for a while now. There's just something captivating about it: from its surprisingly beautiful combinations of notes to its consistent noteworthy longevity and subtle projection and even its iconic bottle design.

In my opinion, Dior Homme is a front-runner in terms of fragrance lines. Very few lines even come close.

Unlike Dior Homme 2020, which greatly deviated from the rest of the line in a less-than-popular way, Dior Homme Sport deviates from it in a pleasantly enticing way. 

Take a look at the note breakdown and you'll probably get what I mean:

So, the first thing you'll notice is that they don't even use bergamot in this one. It does make sense though why they'd forgo it considering bergamot tends to be a more subtle citrus note. In the presence of these other ones, bergamot would have been superfluous and likely barely detectable.

What is detectable is the blood orange, grapefruit, and lemon, with the pear going a nice subtle depth to the opening. In fact, all I get for the first couple hours is a whole lot of citrus mixed with some spiciness from the pink pepper and nutmeg.

Once it starts to dry down, I get a bit of the earthy notes. The vetiver and sandalwood do become more noticeable, but they are never the main notes. The bright citrus notes from the top never completely diminish which helps give this one a well-rounded multidimensional feel.

In fact, I have to say, Dior Homme Sport is probably the most surprisingly enjoyable fragrance I've ever had. I really wasn't expecting to love this one as much as I do when I bought it. 

But wow...

The composition alone makes me highly recommend it. I feel like the performance is just icing on the cake!

In terms of longevity, I get around 7-7.5 hours, which is right on par with anything else in the Dior Homme line, but what's so surprising by this is that, as you may know, citrus-heavy fragrances don't usually last more than a few hours. 

For example, Burberry Weekend, which is a great citrus-based fragrance, but it only lasts an hour or so on my skin.

I'm not positive why DH Sport performs so well, but I would guess that it has something to do with the way the notes are layered in the composition.

When it comes to projection, this one is pretty much on par with other Dior Homme fragrances as well. I get a solid forty minutes of decent projection followed by six hours of subtle projection. 

One of my favorite of the Dior Homme line is that the fragrances really don't become a skin scent until the six to seven hour mark. Sure, they're not powerhouses like Sauvage EDT is when it comes to projection, but I think the Dior Homme line is more for people who are looking for that refined, professional, modernized feel.

I think Dior Homme Sport definitely is a great addition to the line, and one that everyone should consider buying for their collection. It really is a great buy!

Speaking of buying, DH sport is going to cost you about the same amount as any Dior fragrance: 

I would recommend going with at least the 4.2oz. Personally, I'm not a fan of the smaller sizes of fragrances. As you can see, for only $20 more, you get nearly twice the amount of fragrance. 

I've never really understood why companies offer a small size bottle of fragrances. What do you guys think?

In terms of versatility, I think this one would work great in both a casual and professional setting. It's not exactly what I would call suit and tie, but for daily wear or even as a signature scent, I think this one would be a great choice. 

Just because of how many different fragrances there are in the DH line, I think I'd reserve this one primarily for casual wear. It definitely has a fun, lively vibe to it that I see really thriving in a more nonchalant situation. For the office, I'd recommend Dior Homme Intense [Review coming shortly]

Overall, I would give Dior Homme Sport a 9/10. Citrus-based scents have never been my favorite, but there's just something special about the way this one is blended that makes it something I want to wear again and again. 

But what do you guys think? Have you tried Dior Homme Sport? How does it compare with other Dior Homme fragrances? Which is your favorite fragrance from the line? Let me know in the comments below!

-Ryan S.

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FCF #5 (Fall Series): Dior Eau Sauvage Extreme vs. Burberry London- Best Go-To Fall Fragrance

 

Fall is right around the corner, and that means it's time to start relying on your wood and spice-based fragrances for when you go out. 

Personally, I've never been the type of person who believes that certain fragrances can only be worn during specific seasons, so while all of the fragrances mentioned in the fall series can be worn year-round, I think the optimal time to use them is during the cooler weather.

In today's premier video of the fall series, I have two substantially different earthy fragrances going head-to head for the title of best go-to fall fragrance.

In fact, I didn't realize how different these fragrances were until I closely compared them both. 

First, I have a vintage fragrance from Dior: Eau Sauvage Extreme. This one, which was first released in 1984, is a primarily herbal-based fragrance. It is very heavy on rosemary and lavender, which makes for a very unique, very earthy fragrance. Perfect for the cool fall weather. 

Going against it is another, slightly newer classic fragrance from Burberry: Burberry London. This one has been described as smelling like Christmas because of the various spices it contains. It is also a great choice for the cooler weather.

Like always, I highly recommend both fragrances, but for the sake of the match-up I'm just going to assume you only want to buy one.

In case you missed the summer matches, we are going to have three rounds to determine the winner: composition, performance, and usability. If necessary, there will be an additional round added at the end. 

But without further delay, let's get into it. 

Round I: Composition

Dior Eau Sauvage Extreme: Top Notes: Lemon, Bergamot, Patchouli, and Lavender Middle Notes: Rosemary, Bay Leaf, and Coriander Bottom Notes: Amber, Patchouli, and Cedar

I was actually surprised when I tried Eau Sauvage Extreme. I know the Eau Sauvage EDT is very citrus-heavy to the point that anything else in the composition is a secondary player.

The Extreme version, which is an Eau De Toilette Intense, is a completely different Eau Sauvage. Instead of relying on citrus notes to carry the fragrance, it uses herbal, earthy notes, which make it ideal for the cool fall weather.

When I first apply it, I get a lot of the rosemary mixed with what smells like pine trees. The citrus is also there for the first few moments before quickly dissipating. After that, it becomes predominantly earthy- reminding me of a walk through a luscious green forest.

Dior Eau Sauvage Extreme is definitely a more vintage, unique fragrance, albeit it is not a complicated one. What I get in the first hour of wear is what I get during the last hour.

Even so, this is without-a-doubt the epitome of what a fall fragrance should be, in my opinion.

Burberry London: Top Notes: Cinnamon, Lavender, and Bergamot Middle Notes: Mimosa and Leather Bottom Notes: Tobacco Leaf, Guaiac Wood, and Oakmoss

Burberry London is a vastly different kind of fragrance than the former. While Eau Sauvage Extreme is a green fragrance, London would probably be considered an oriental fragrance, making them nearly opposites according to the fragrance wheel.

London is actually a fragrance that many reviewers say "smells like Christmas," I would definitely agree with that. I think the cinnamon gives the fragrance a perfect holiday feel.

Much like the first fragrance, it is not a complicated scent, but that's alright because it's the simplicity in London that makes it such a fall appropriate composition. 

When I apply it initially, I get a lot of the cinnamon fused with a bit of the guaiac wood and tobacco leaf. The lavender also plays a part in adding an earthy kind of feel to the fragrance  It is really quite nice. 

Also, a great choice for fall wear, although perhaps more suited for the second half of the season when the weather's getting cooler.

Winner: Personally, I actually prefer the composition of Burberry London. It reminds me a lot of Maison Christian Dior's Spice Blend. However, because I am not judging these fragrances based-on my opinions, I think both are equally good choices for a fall go-to scent. It really just depends on whether you prefer green fragrances or oriental fragrances, like me. Therefore, this round is a draw.

Eau Sauvage Extreme: 0 Burberry London: 0

Round II: Performance

Dior Eau Savage Extreme: 6 hours longevity, 40 minutes projection

Burberry London: 7 hours longevity, 1.5 hours projection (light), becomes a skin-scent shortly after

Both fragrances are pretty decent in terms of longevity and will give you a nice scent bubble for the first few hours. 

Because they're not overpowering fragrances, I feel like you can generously apply them without having to worry about over applying. I I used twelve sprays each for this battle.

As you can probably tell by the numbers, London does offer slightly better performance. It lasts for an additional hour-- granted it's a skin scent at that point-- and projects for nearly twice as long. 

I feel Eau Sauvage Extreme does project a bit more loudly in the opening hour of wearing the fragrance which complicates my decision  a bit. 

Also, both fragrances seem to perform better in the cooler weather; akin to the performance of D&G Light Blue in the heat.

Winner: Considering the last hour or so of Burberry London it is a skin scent, I once again have to declare the round a draw. Both Eau Sauvage Extreme and London are great performers in the fall weather; either would be an incredibly great choice for a fall go-to fragrance

Round III: Usability

Dior Eau Sauvage Extreme: Both casual and professional wear, great for intimate gatherings, generally safe, may require some thought before wear

Burberry London: Both casual and professional wear, perfect for intimate gatherings, great date fragrance, very safe

I think both fragrances are just about equally versatile. Both can be used both casually and professionally as well as to intimate gatherings. 

But there is one significant difference between the two fragrances that will ultimately determine the outcome of the match-up.

And that is this...

Because more people seem to appreciate spice-based fragrances, including myself, more than herbal, earthy, green fragrances, I think Burberry London is a much safer choice between the two. This is because it is more mass-appealing.

I'm not saying Eau Sauvage Extreme is an unsafe fragrance or one that you have to carefully consider before wearing, rather I think it's one that is simply not going to work in every situation or with every person.

That doesn't mean Burberry London is a completely safe choice. I'm sure there's still going to be people who think it's too much, but in terms of a go-to fragrance, I think London is a bit better of a choice.

Winner: While both fragrances are pretty versatile in terms of situations and events, I think Burberry London is a bit more mass-appealing due to it's festive-like composition. Therefore, the winner of this round has to go to London.

Eau Sauvage Extreme: 0 Burberry London: 1

Final Thoughts: Both Eau Sauvage Extreme and Burberry London are great choices for fall fragrances. Both perform incredibly well in the cooler weather and both contain fall-related notes. It was incredibly hard putting these two head-to-head, because, like I said in the introduction, I wasn't even aware how different yet similar these fragrances are. But what it ultimately comes down to is the fact that a spice-based fragrance, like London, is going to be a little bit safer to wear than an herbal fragrance like Eau Sauvage Extreme.

Best Go-To Fall Fragrance: Burberry London

-Ryan S.

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